What is Baby G up to? Baby G is the size of an artichoke, or according to my other app, a pair of sunglasses. I’ve felt some flutters in my lower belly, and David was even able to feel a kick. Just like his/her brother, definitely a busy baby!
How am I feeling? I’m on cruise control in this pregnancy. Right at that stage where I’m not too uncomfortable, and starting to feel more energy. I’ve started to workout again, which feels great. I think I may have developed an allergy to eggs, because after eating them I broke out in a rash on my arms and felt nauseas for the next 12 hours. Other than that, I’m just HOT!
What am I wearing? Lots and lots of dresses! And trying to make them work in different ways by styling them differently.
What am I craving/eating? I’ve had a craving for steamed shrimp with Ole Bay seasoning. Someone satisfy this craving for me!
What’s on my mind lately? I’m trying to soak in the last summer with Finn and David before another round of chaos changes our lives again. I am trying to spend as much time as a family as possible and I’m so looking forward to a week away with my family in just a couple weeks.
What am I looking forward to? I’m always looking forward to the weekend to spend time with David and Finn and to add a little more to our house. Things are starting to come together, but I have a long to-do list to complete before baby comes in November!
Best moment of the week? David felt the baby move, which is much earlier than with Finn. It’s crazy to think we don’t know this little nugget yet, but in just a few short months, he or she will be such a huge part of our lives!
Do you ever feel like the universe is trying to tell you something? Like it’s sending you messages? They may be subtle at first, but if you aren’t catching on, they become more and more obvious until you can’t really avoid it anymore. This happened to me recently, and clearly I was way too busy paying attention to everything else in my life that by the time the message actually got to me, it couldn’t have been more blatant.
The message? Live simple. It’s something that I always strive to achieve, but is pretty difficult to put into practice on a daily basis. Things happen, work gets busy, bills have to be paid, stress overwhelms and pretty soon that dream of living simply is just that, a dream.
I was reminded of my goal to live simple last week when two separate songs came onto my Spotify playlist (if you’re a lyric junkie like me, check out this song and this song), both with the word ‘simple’ in the title, and both songs that I could totally relate to. Since initially hearing them, I’ve probably listened to them a hundred more times. The message the universe sent was heard.
How does one live simple? Well, I certainly feel inspired by the warm weather and a simple, classic outfit like this one. I try to remain present and if I feel myself getting overwhelmed, I stop to meditate or listen to calm or inspiring music. I also try not to put too much pressure on myself. If that means I don’t get my to-do list done, that’s okay. If I miss a workout, it’s not the end of the world. If I’m too tired to make dinner, then let’s go out. Of course there are times that difficult choices have to be made, but I like to save those for the big things. Dinner and outfits and music should be simple.
Now for the outfit – I just got this top in my latest Trunk (and if you haven’t tried Trunk Club yet, read all about it here) and it’s perfect for summer. It’s non-maternity, but totally works with a bump, and will grow with me as well. The sleeves are loose, so it looks so cute with a bralette underneath. I grabbed this hat during the Nordstrom sale last week and I love it! It’s perfect for summer.
The last few months have been full of big changes for me. Heck, that last few years have been nothing but changes. I like to remind myself that this is life happening in real time. All those big things that are supposed to happen in your life have happened to me in the last four years – graduate school, first big job, first big failure (losing said job), moving to a new city, getting engaged and married, getting settled into a career, getting pregnant, having a baby, buying a house, getting pregnant again. Exhausting.
It’s not hard to see why I feel a little unsettled and even a little uncomfortable. Since moving into our house, I’ve been struggling a bit with this next chapter in my life. I was feeling lost and, frankly, afraid. It’s as if four years ago I had a vision of the trajectory of my life, held my breath, and woke up four years later a little dazed and confused.
I touched on this in my 15 week bumpdate last week, but this whole mom thing has got me feeling things I never thought I would feel in my life. I had always balked at the idea of being maternal, and now the reality of that has never sounded so right. Like I said, I’m exhausted, and partially because I’m tired of splitting my worlds – professional and personal. Call me naive, but I thought that I would be able to continue to break all the glass ceilings during the day, play choo-choo and change diapers all night and weekend and it would all feel right.
But I don’t even want that anymore.
After long talks with David, and a lot of soul-searching, I’m starting to find clarity in what I want out of my life. My word for 2018 was intention, and I’ve realized that being intentional with my decisions bring me the most happiness, balance and flexibility that I crave.
So what does that look like?
Let’s start with broad strokes. First, it means taking care of myself – physically and mentally. That means eating better, getting my body moving, reading books, and continuing to have those introspective conversations with myself that will provide clarity and motivation.
Second, it means allowing myself to get comfortable with this new version of me. I’m at my best when I’m vulnerable, passionate, emotional and spontaneous. I’ve been fighting these natural instincts because my vision of a working mom is orderly, put-together, and poised. But those characteristics are never and will never be me. Won’t Finn be best when I’m at my best, regardless if that means I’m a little haphazard and chaotic sometimes? Those words get a bad wrap, but some of the best days are those filled with complete chaos 🙂
Third, it means sharing more about these feelings – hence being vulnerable. Ask my mom and she’ll tell you I’ve always been a thinker and probably overly emotional. But those things are what make me, me! I love nostalgia, and hearing songs you haven’t heard in forever, and listening to lyrics, and keeping crap that has sentimental value. I love deep conversation and making changes out of those conversations. I love asking why not?!
Most of these thoughts may seem natural and a little random, but to be honest I’ve been tricked into believing that being vulnerable is a negative thing. The realization that out of vulnerability comes clarity is huge, and something I’ve been searching for for the last few years.
So, some other random thoughts to leave you with 🙂
If you’re feeling uncomfortable or out of sorts, don’t fight it. Let your feelings take their natural path and work themselves out.
If you’re feeling too comfortable, do something TODAY that makes you feel uncomfortable. Change only happens when you’re outside of your comfort zone.
Thanks for reading this blog. It’s my biggest passion and often gets pushed to the side to make room for other adult responsibilities, but I’ve never regretted writing a single post and I appreciate you taking some time to read them all.
What is Baby G up to? Baby G is the size of a navel orange. I’m pretty sure I felt some movement earlier this week, and I’m positive I saw baby moving when I was laying flat on my back the other day. If this babe is anything like his or her brother, then sitting still just doesn’t happen.
How am I feeling? The answer to this question changes day to day. One day I’m full of energy, upbeat and ready to take on the world and the next I’m hovering over the toilet all morning and taking three hour naps – that is if it’s the weekend. I’m pretty sure my coworkers are starting to worry about my mental state cause I’ve been like a walking zombie at work, but honestly, I’m just beat.
I keep recalling the specific thought I had when I was pregnant with Finn, that people actually do pregnancy with another kid at home – more often than not, a toddler! I remember thinking it would be impossible, and I wasn’t far off. Yes, I’m being a bit dramatic, but at the end of a work day, I’m finding it even more difficult to find the energy to be a mom. It’s draining, and got me thinking a lot about my future as a mom of two kids. But more of that below…
What am I wearing? I’m trying to be more aware of the pieces I’m buying this pregnancy. I want to ensure that my wardrobe can work for post-pregnancy as well, so I’m investing in pieces that I like with or without a bump. Right now, I’m still in a lot of my normal clothes, with some exceptions (the jeans went out the window around week 8), but with the weather being so warm, dresses are doing the job just fine.
What am I craving/eating? Not having any overwhelming cravings this pregnancy, just letting myself eat what I want, without stressing the number on the scale too much. I started this pregnancy below my first pre-pregnancy weight and my weight gain has been very similar to my pregnancy with Finn. I stressed about how my body looked a lot the first time around, but was pleasantly surprised at how well I bounced back, so I’m letting myself enjoy this time, without going too crazy.
What’s on my mind lately? Like I mentioned above, the thought of being a working mom of two has my mind racing. I just don’t like the thought of it. Let’s take a trip down memory lane… when I first had Finn, I remember looking forward to going back to work, I think for the sense of normalcy. I craved adult attention and a purpose other than nursing and changing diapers. Somewhere along the road, maybe when Finn was nine or ten months old, I started dreading the daycare drop-off. And the older he gets, the harder it is for me to say goodbye to him every morning. Now that he’s two, I can’t stop thinking about all the time I’ve missed with him. The normalcy I once craved is becoming stale, and a little meaningless. I struggle with this daily! And that alone is exhausting. Is getting a paycheck worth it? There’s the career woman in me that argues that it is, but more and more of me is becoming a mom, and being a stay at home mom is something I never envisioned for myself.
Now we are a few months away from having two children and I know that mom feeling will only grow. I find purpose being a mom, and that fuels me. And, I’m tired of choosing between the two worlds. I think this topic could be it’s own post, because I have a lot to say about it. But this is certainly the most overwhelming feeling I have right now. Any other mamas relate?
What am I looking forward to? David has been out of town this week for work, so I’m looking forward to him coming home! I’m also looking forward to adding some decoration to our bare walls and maybe finally pulling the trigger on an area rug?? We will see…
Best moment of the week? Finn is talking up a storm. The other day, we went to Lowe’s to pick up a few things and as David was checking out, Finn and I decided to sit on the tractors outside and play. I sat right in a puddle, and poor Finn was soo distraught that I got wet! He kept telling David that “Mama sat on tractor, got wet”. It was adorable… the whole way home!
Happy Tuesday! I’ve been online shopping like crazy for stuff for the new house, but I’m also looking for clothing that will help me survive the summer with a growing belly. All the items listed in this week’s Things I’m Loving would work if you are pregnant, but nothing is maternity! I’m also on the hunt for items that will work postpartum and specifically for nursing. Happy shopping!
Things I’m Loving:
Sleeveless Button Smock Dress
I’ve been eye this cute dress for a while and will be buying it ASAP since ASOS is having a 20% off sale through 8am Wednesday! (Yes, everything is 20% off, so get shopping). I’ve seen this on a few other folks and it works well with a small bump, so hopefully this will get me through the summer months! I plan to size up one.
Another non-maternity option that will work with a bump. I love the midi-length, and the empire waist will allow for a growing belly. But this will beautiful on anyone! I love the top detail and the buttons down the middle (nursing friendly, too!) Oh, did I mention it’s currently 50% off!
These sandals came in my last Trunk from Trunk Club. They are super comfortable and really cute. I didn’t keep them because I a similar pair, but if you are looking for something like this (totally business casual appropriate), grab these up. They are currently 40% off and come in three colors.
This pregnancy, I’m all about trying to find pieces that will work for the bump, postpartum and well after baby. And this shirt fits the bill for all three categories. It’s super cute, comes in several colors and is only $34.